The Truth About Clutter

According to several of the blogs that I’ve read in preparation for my new lifestyle, I’ve encountered the reason behind all of the clutter that we have in our lives. We own things because we are natural consumers or because something was on sale and we decided to consequently buy 20 of that thing.

Some minimalist authorities seem to believe that we only keep things just in case or that we’re too selfish to give things away, and that’s just shallow. Their theories are as valid as any other theories, including mine, but I refuse to believe that people are just consuming things for the sake of it. Humans are complex and wonderful things, products of a million variables, and taking into account only the same four or five factors that some believe leads to a life of hoarding or consumption doesn’t do them justice.

So, I’d like to add my own.

 

FEAR

Like, real-life fear. What happens if a button pops off of my interview pants just an hour before I have to be at a big interview? I had a back-up pair. What if so-and-so comes to my house and they don’t see that thing they gave me six years ago and I hurt their feelings? I don’t want to be that person! I kept it. Sometimes in a closet, wrapped up for what was seemingly an endless amount of time and they never asked about it again.

INCOME

It is much easier to throw out your old notebooks when you can always buy new ones. If you aren’t taking in too much income for any reason, it is easier to be tempted to hold onto things—it only makes sense to. Those last couple pages may be what keeps you from having to take down notes on the back of a receipt.

HARDWIRING

People just aren’t built to naturally want to let go of things. The tendency to hoard is built into the brain, just like the love of sugar and fats. Then, we build attachment to the things that we have hoarded. We as a people develop symbols from things we see daily. Maybe a piece of furniture is no longer just a piece of furniture, but a reminder of my father or the house that I used to live in. It’s a symbol now.

 

It is more than FOMO or even just having something around that we haven’t used yet. It’s more than ‘being a pawn’ or being greedy. For some, it can actually be painful to let things go even when they are going somewhere where they will be used all the time and worn into oblivion. (A valuable use of any object.)

Some objects become love letters from friends and family or from yourself.

Minimalism isn’t easy. It’s down-right hard. If you aren’t prepared to it, you aren’t going to succeed. Part of what you have to do in order to lead a minimalist lifestyle is to fight against your nature.

A tip that I saw recently read: do not keep things out of guilt. As if it’s that easy.

Here’s some of my favorite sentimental clutter.

I am a sentimental hoarder. Since beginning my grand cull, I have thrown out a lot of wonderful things like beautiful artwork that my brother made for me when he was four or five years old. These things bring me joy, but take up a lot of space when I keep dozens of pieces. However, one of the hardest things that I had to let go of was a card that was sent to me from the funeral home after the death of my father. For 10 years, I kept it hidden away, but still thought of it pretty often. For reasons more complex than I can explain, I couldn’t let it go. I didn’t feel better or worse when I got rid of it, but it was something I kept for almost half of my life, taking up space in my sentimental hoard.

So, is there one universal truth about clutter?

In Which It Begins

In a cute little apartment on main street in a cute little town, I live between the cute little mountains in a cute little valley in western North Carolina.

This is what it looked like on day 3

When Tom and I first moved into our apartment, the only furniture we had was a kitchen table, a couple of chairs, and a cot. Both of us had previously lived with roommates whose belongings completely furnished our respective apartments. In the effort to make our new space seem livable and homey, we added many, many things and in a way, we succeeded. It looks like people live here now.

We had finally been given the chance to make a space where we could showcase our personalities. And what was where the problem began. Our personalities were everywhere, in every nook and cranny of our apartment, and it all looked like mismatched and cluttered discord.

I considered minimalism.

Naturally, after a lot of self-reflection due to learning more about this lifestyle, I’ve remembered that my happiest times were centered around stretches when I had very few things with me. On trips with my family, I found a lot more happiness when I was interacting with others and then retiring with a book. (I am very introverted. Too much time with others is mentally exhausting for me.) When I am on those trips, I don’t end up packing much more than some clothes and a couple of things to do with my extra time.

Three years ago, I spent a summer living out of my car. The possessions that I brought with me included the same essential things: books, clothing, and things that I could use to write. During this time, I focused almost exclusively on my relationships with others and my love of creating.  These are the times that I consider to be pivotal moments of my adulthood and they are feelings that I associate with living with less.

My partner and I had filled and were pouring out of our home and we needed to make a real change. I decided that I this is what I needed for myself, and after we talked about it, he decided to follow my example. On the surface, it’s all very simple. I decided that there was too much stuff, so I got rid of it, but I wouldn’t uproot my entire way of living just so that I could make things prettier. I had needed more of a reason than that.

Most of you know the same struggle that has led me to the journey that I am undertaking. 350 million people around the world have depression and I am only one of them. Those of us who are able tend to be willing to sacrifice a lot in order to improve our lot. Those of us who are not able are sacrificing a lot as well. This is something I could go on and on about as someone with a history both undergoing and providing mental health treatment.

I’ve tried adding things to my life in the attempt to make it more fulfilling for years, and sometimes those things worked. I added more books to my life and reading made me happier. I added more varied food to my diet and I felt happier and healthier. I added more hobbies and learned a lot about a few more areas. Tom and I have a collection of over 300 books. While reading them made me happier, trying to find a space for them on one of our eight fully-flushed bookshelves did not.

My readings list from 2015

I probably spent hundreds of dollars on books last year and there are entire bookshelves in the house that I never reference.

My depression was no longer aided by adding things into my life. I decided to start subtracting things. At this point, I have been in the process of culling and donating many of my possessions in the effort to begin living as the best type of minimalist that I can be.

That being said, it’s important to specify that I am not using minimalism as a treatment for my mental illness, but as a way of improving my character, my financial situation, and as a way of working toward my life goals. This isn’t a blog about being depressed. It’s a blog about learning something new through experience. Everything else that happens will just be a side effect.

Through research about others experiences with minimalism, I’m learning that changing my consumptive lifestyle doesn’t mean that I have to be in the business of denying myself wants or needs, but practicing gratitude and logic in ways that I have always found valuable.

What I am in the business of is making a change.